Friday, May 29, 2009

Eye spy an opportunity

I read this morning where scientists have developed the technology to coat contact lenses with stem cells to reverse blindness. I didn’t read the whole article so I don’t know wether you send the lenses away to the Poindexters for treatment or wether they send you an embryo and a set of instructions but the idea seemed a good one.

And it got me thinking about the range of possibilities for this brave new world of stem cell technology. I mean, would it be possible to coat the hats of bald men and then, when they got home and took off their hat and said, “Hi Honey, I’m home!”would he look like high-achieving entrepreneurial go-getter, Homer Simpson in the Dimoxinil episode? Or would his wife stab him with a kitchen knife thinking that he was a homicidal intruder? I don’t think science ever really considers all the possible consequences.

What about coating the seats on wheelchairs or the armpit rests on crutches? And speaking of crutches, what would happen if you wore stem cell impregnated jocks for a week? The possibilities are mind boggling.

So how about this; could the labcoats work out a way to put liver and brain cells in beer? Beer would then become a health tonic which replaces damaged cells AS YOU DESTROY THEM!!?

Just a thought.

Prof. Pilsner


Beer Blokes said...

i just had another thought ... what if you combined some cranial sten cells with some male genital stem cells ... would that make you a dickhead?

reeksy said...

I think you've been drinking too much again ... and you seem to have got your crutches mixed up with your crotches - ouch! :)

Beer Blokes said...

It's a line from a very old gag along the lines of; "My barber broke his leg and now he has to cut hair on crutches." (BRRRR -Boom - Tishhh!)